AUTISM

As an adult living with Autism Spectrum Disorder, it can often feel like every day is spent waiting for the next disruption or meltdown. And in a world full of fidget spinners and ‘pop-it’ toys, it can be hard to find things that have a helpful, lasting impact in our everyday lives. But if there’s anything I learned since my Autism diagnosis — it’s that having a varied and powerful arsenal of coping mechanisms can make life unimaginably easier. And for many Autistic adults dealing with the stressors of everyday life, many of these coping skills are downright indispensable. By knowing our needs, controlling our environments, and creating mindful decisions about the spaces we exist in, we can better manage our mood, dodge dysregulation, and recover from the daily doses of over-stimulation. When we commit to learning, and preparing for the things that stress us out the most, we begin to understand ourselves on a deeper, more wholesome level. But with a stark lack of resources and dozens upon dozens of neurotypical self-help sites, it can be hard to know where to begin. And with dysregulation seemingly around every corner, finding the room in your life to make meaningful change can seem daunting. Here are 10 things every Autistic adult should have to help dodge over-stimulation and begin their journey of self-growth. 1. A Noise Machine – The sound of silence is sweet — but if you can’t get it, this is the next best thing. A good White Noise Machine can be an absolute lifesaver. When you’re one unfortunately timed car alarm away from a meltdown, a Noise Machine is exactly what you need. Most have a variety of sounds, ranging from things like tropical rainforests to crackling campfires. And for those who like White Noise, the world of ‘Noises’ is a surprisingly wide one. Most machines offering a wide array of options — like ‘Pink’, ‘Blue’, or even ‘Black’ noises, to help combat a wide array of disturbances. There’s undoubtedly a sound for everyone. And with models starting from $20, you’ll always have some sweet sound when you need it. 2. Earplugs – Sometimes though, we’ve just got to keep it quiet. Whether it be the office or the back porch, sometimes the world would be better if it were just a bit quieter. And with unexpected disruptions being an unfortunate standard in our day-to-day, it’s always good for us to think ahead. Enter earplugs. We can’t take our Noise Machines everywhere, and ANC headphones can get overstimulating when worn for too long. Earplugs, on the other hand, offer us a portable, comfortable, and sometimes stylish option when it comes to sound management. Best of all, they’re highly accessible, so you’ll never have to go without them — a pack of foam ones can be found at any hardware store for about $10. For those with sound sensitivities, earplugs are not only a preventative measure but a disability aid as well. And with innovations being made in earplugs — like ones designed especially for Neurodivergent adults — investing in a good pair can be life-changing. It was for me. My personal favorites are Loop Earplugs. Designed with neurodivergence in mind, Loop provides a stylish collection of earplugs for any situation you can imagine, whether it be their silicone and sleep-focused Quiet models, or their 3-in-1 Loop Switch earplugs, that allow you to slide between three levels of sound-dampening and noise-reduction filters. Whether foam, silicone, or whatever the future holds, Earplugs are a must-have for Autistic adults living with Misophonia and Hyperacusis. 3. Weighted Lap-Pads – If there’s anything Autism self-help books love to recommend, it’s weighted blankets. And there’s no wonder, Deep Pressure Therapy — the science behind weighted blankets — can work miracles on the nervous system. But a huge 20-pound blanket isn’t always practical — and they’re rarely cheap. That’s where weighted lap-pads can help. Whether it be a non-descript but helpful 5-pound pad in your lap or a 10-pound dino plushie, weighted items are a great thing to have in your self-regulation toolbox. In times of much-needed grounding and rest, these comfort items can often give us a sense of safety and coziness when we need it most. They come in all shapes in sizes, so finding one suited to your taste — and price range — is as easy as a quick Google search. 4. Candles and Incense – Yankee Candle may give scented candles a bad name, and most people may cringe at the thought of an eye-wateringly intense incense in the air — but make no mistake, scent can be a savior. When you’re living with sensory sensitivities, controlling the scent around you can be a powerful tool. Not only are they stimulating, but scented candles and incense also give us a sense of control in our environment. Having a bedroom that always smells of lavender, or a workspace with your favorite vanilla candle, can do a lot in making the space more inviting, comforting, and in times of sensory stress, grounding too. With candles and incense widely available in nearly any scent under the sun, you’re sure to find one that suits your price range and your tastes. 5. Low lighting and Sunset Lamps – Time to party like it’s 1889! In my household, low-lighting options like handheld lamps and USB-powered lanterns are a must. Helpful for light sensitivities and your circadian rhythm, don’t be afraid to turn the lights down low after sundown. Limiting the use of overhead, cool-toned lighting during the evening can help more than you think. Having rechargeable lamps and colored lights around your house can be a great way to reduce overstimulation. At night, reducing blue lights — in exchange for yellow and orange options — can also increase melatonin production, helping you fall asleep right on time. These lights fall into the ‘fairly affordable’ bin with many starting at $10 — $15. And with a bunch of stylish options like USB-paper lanterns, to sleek handheld options, you can always find one to fit your decor. My favorite has to be Sunset lamps. Sunset lamps are lights that use LEDs to mimic natural sunlight or any other color of the rainbow. The perfect option in this category, these lights fill your room with a halo of warm comforting light. Fully customizable and controllable via an app, you can change the color settings on these throughout the day, giving you the perfect lighting for any situation. 6. Active Noise Cancelling Headphones – Huge Headphones never go out of style — and with the help of Active-Noise Cancellation, you’ll want to wear them everywhere. Many of us with sound sensitivities, or those that consider themselves sensory-seeking, may already have a long-standing love for headphones, and music as a whole. Headphones with Active Noise Cancellation take that to the next level. If you don’t already have a pair, I definitely recommend getting your hands on a pair of Over-the-Ear Bluetooth Headphones with Active Noise Cancellation. Active Noise Cancellation allows your headphones to react to your environment, supplying a near-inaudibly stream of white noise to counteract any environmental distractions. Not only do ANC headphones make your music sound better — but they can also make moving through the world easier too. 7. A Sensory Swing – Sometimes, we just want to turn the entire world off. But if a $3000 Sensory Deprivation Tank is a bit out of your price range, then a Sensory Swing is undoubtedly the next best thing. And hey, who says the kids get to have all the fun? Sensory Swings have no age limit! Sensory Swings are pod-like hammocks made of a stretchy material like Lycra. They’re designed to hug you all over, delivering the same Deep Pressure Therapy that makes weighted blankets so great. And while a tiny space like that may sound like a nightmare to some, the soothing sensory input they provide can offer some Neurodivergent people amazing peace and immediate benefits. Sensory Swings are perfect for offering you a much-needed place to go in times of stress. Think of it like a hideaway — hidden away from sounds, bright lights, and other sensory stressors. Besides hitting a metaphorical reset on your nervous system, Sensory Swings have the added bonus of incorporating gentle movement — something a lot of Autistic adults may lack. They’re easy to install to most ceilings, and with most models able to hold up to 250lbs or more, these stretchy cocoons are the perfect sensory safe space. 8. Comfort Foods-To-Go – Having a To-Go comfort food is a no-brainer. A small snack heated in the microwave, a sandwich that can be thrown together, or even having your favorite warm drink on hand can save you infinite time, headaches, and executive functioning. Keep these handy (and cheap) options around and always stocked, and you’ll be thanking yourself when you come out the other side of hyperfocus. For me, these treats are usually pre-packaged croissants that I can microwave with a bit of butter for a sweet dose of carbs. But in times of high stress — a cup of hot tea is always my go-to. The ritual of prepping your snack can be soothing in and of itself, like the consistent rhythm of constructing your favorite sandwich, in the same order, every time. Finding and identifying a 5-minute comfort food is something all Autistic adults should do, whether it be for late nights of hyperfocus, or on days when your executive functioning isn’t exactly functioning. 9. A Special Interest Item – It goes without saying but ( — since I love talking about Special Interests ) I’ll say it anyway. No matter what the age, Special Interests are things that are important and incredibly enriching to autistic people, young and old. Not only are they things that help us process or cope with the allistic world around us, but they can drive us to develop new skills too. Make no mistake — Special Interests should be fostered and even celebrated. Having a tangible item having to do with your interests does just that. If you’re into Marine Biology, having a shirt of your favorite kind of whale may feel indulgent, and empowering when you wear it. If you are really into a specific video game, having a poster you can see even when not playing can bring you great joy. Special Interests color our lives in unfathomable ways, and although we may be shamed for them by the people around us, we should love and — take advantage of them. Consider being indulgent, and buying yourself a plushie, an article of clothing, a figurine, or a poster of your interest. Special Interests are special to us for a reason. They’re there to bring us joy! 10. A Community – Some things are worth more than money could ever buy. When living with Autism Spectrum Disorder, it can often feel like living at odds with the world — its sensory experiences, its logic, and most of all, other people. Over time, it can feel more and more isolating. And this feeling is one many of us experience all our lives, from childhood to the everyday workplace — and even our own homes. When you’re an autistic adult, a community is priceless. And it can look any way you feel comfortable with. For some, community means having a few Autistic friends or connecting with other Autistic people online via a forum or Discord. For others, a community can be a formal meet-up group, with returning members, scheduled activities, and routine meetups. Others may find Zoom groups more comfortable. Whatever your preferred form of connection may be — it’s a connection nonetheless. Talking, connecting, and befriending other Autistic people can often be one of the first steps of unmasking, uncovering, and unlearning neurotypical expectations, and even voicing thoughts you’d had forever. (Like why does everyone ask “How are you doing?” if it’s not really a question????) Communities can look any way, and many have social meets like D&D sessions or group chats on learning useful neurodivergent skills. No matter how you jump in though, I hope you find your happy place. Whether you’re formally diagnosed, self-diagnosed, or just questioning whether or not you may be Autistic — living as a Neurodivergent adult can be undoubtedly tough. With daily dysregulation and lengthy recovery times, things like self-care and soothing can be a mystery. It can be hard to even know what you need, let alone where to begin. And living in a world full of Instagram ‘grind’ culture accounts and allistic self-help books surely doesn’t help. But if there’s one thing that anyone living on the Spectrum needs on their journey — 100% — it’s Self-Acceptance. By understanding ourselves and our brains, we can begin to discover and name our needs. We can begin to take care of ourselves in new, more fruitful ways that make life easier, and more enjoyable. We’re able to create spaces, routines, and relationships that can revitalize us, and change our lives. I hope that through this list, you’re able to understand yourself or your needs a bit more and begin incorporating things into your life that can help make coping with ASD easier. What are some tools in your meltdown toolbox? Are there any Autistic-friendly things you can’t live without? I’d love to hear! Thanks for reading and have a divergent day!

10 Things EVERY Autistic Adult Should Own As an adult living with Autism Spectrum Disorder, it can often feel like every day is spent waiting for the next disruption or meltdown. And in a world full of fidget spinners and ‘pop-it’ toys, it can be hard to find things that have a helpful, lasting impact

As an adult living with Autism Spectrum Disorder, it can often feel like every day is spent waiting for the next disruption or meltdown. And in a world full of fidget spinners and ‘pop-it’ toys, it can be hard to find things that have a helpful, lasting impact in our everyday lives. But if there’s anything I learned since my Autism diagnosis — it’s that having a varied and powerful arsenal of coping mechanisms can make life unimaginably easier. And for many Autistic adults dealing with the stressors of everyday life, many of these coping skills are downright indispensable. By knowing our needs, controlling our environments, and creating mindful decisions about the spaces we exist in, we can better manage our mood, dodge dysregulation, and recover from the daily doses of over-stimulation. When we commit to learning, and preparing for the things that stress us out the most, we begin to understand ourselves on a deeper, more wholesome level. But with a stark lack of resources and dozens upon dozens of neurotypical self-help sites, it can be hard to know where to begin. And with dysregulation seemingly around every corner, finding the room in your life to make meaningful change can seem daunting. Here are 10 things every Autistic adult should have to help dodge over-stimulation and begin their journey of self-growth. 1. A Noise Machine – The sound of silence is sweet — but if you can’t get it, this is the next best thing. A good White Noise Machine can be an absolute lifesaver. When you’re one unfortunately timed car alarm away from a meltdown, a Noise Machine is exactly what you need. Most have a variety of sounds, ranging from things like tropical rainforests to crackling campfires. And for those who like White Noise, the world of ‘Noises’ is a surprisingly wide one. Most machines offering a wide array of options — like ‘Pink’, ‘Blue’, or even ‘Black’ noises, to help combat a wide array of disturbances. There’s undoubtedly a sound for everyone. And with models starting from $20, you’ll always have some sweet sound when you need it. 2. Earplugs – Sometimes though, we’ve just got to keep it quiet. Whether it be the office or the back porch, sometimes the world would be better if it were just a bit quieter. And with unexpected disruptions being an unfortunate standard in our day-to-day, it’s always good for us to think ahead. Enter earplugs. We can’t take our Noise Machines everywhere, and ANC headphones can get overstimulating when worn for too long. Earplugs, on the other hand, offer us a portable, comfortable, and sometimes stylish option when it comes to sound management. Best of all, they’re highly accessible, so you’ll never have to go without them — a pack of foam ones can be found at any hardware store for about $10. For those with sound sensitivities, earplugs are not only a preventative measure but a disability aid as well. And with innovations being made in earplugs — like ones designed especially for Neurodivergent adults — investing in a good pair can be life-changing. It was for me. My personal favorites are Loop Earplugs. Designed with neurodivergence in mind, Loop provides a stylish collection of earplugs for any situation you can imagine, whether it be their silicone and sleep-focused Quiet models, or their 3-in-1 Loop Switch earplugs, that allow you to slide between three levels of sound-dampening and noise-reduction filters. Whether foam, silicone, or whatever the future holds, Earplugs are a must-have for Autistic adults living with Misophonia and Hyperacusis. 3. Weighted Lap-Pads – If there’s anything Autism self-help books love to recommend, it’s weighted blankets. And there’s no wonder, Deep Pressure Therapy — the science behind weighted blankets — can work miracles on the nervous system. But a huge 20-pound blanket isn’t always practical — and they’re rarely cheap. That’s where weighted lap-pads can help. Whether it be a non-descript but helpful 5-pound pad in your lap or a 10-pound dino plushie, weighted items are a great thing to have in your self-regulation toolbox. In times of much-needed grounding and rest, these comfort items can often give us a sense of safety and coziness when we need it most. They come in all shapes in sizes, so finding one suited to your taste — and price range — is as easy as a quick Google search. 4. Candles and Incense – Yankee Candle may give scented candles a bad name, and most people may cringe at the thought of an eye-wateringly intense incense in the air — but make no mistake, scent can be a savior. When you’re living with sensory sensitivities, controlling the scent around you can be a powerful tool. Not only are they stimulating, but scented candles and incense also give us a sense of control in our environment. Having a bedroom that always smells of lavender, or a workspace with your favorite vanilla candle, can do a lot in making the space more inviting, comforting, and in times of sensory stress, grounding too. With candles and incense widely available in nearly any scent under the sun, you’re sure to find one that suits your price range and your tastes. 5. Low lighting and Sunset Lamps – Time to party like it’s 1889! In my household, low-lighting options like handheld lamps and USB-powered lanterns are a must. Helpful for light sensitivities and your circadian rhythm, don’t be afraid to turn the lights down low after sundown. Limiting the use of overhead, cool-toned lighting during the evening can help more than you think. Having rechargeable lamps and colored lights around your house can be a great way to reduce overstimulation. At night, reducing blue lights — in exchange for yellow and orange options — can also increase melatonin production, helping you fall asleep right on time. These lights fall into the ‘fairly affordable’ bin with many starting at $10 — $15. And with a bunch of stylish options like USB-paper lanterns, to sleek handheld options, you can always find one to fit your decor. My favorite has to be Sunset lamps. Sunset lamps are lights that use LEDs to mimic natural sunlight or any other color of the rainbow. The perfect option in this category, these lights fill your room with a halo of warm comforting light. Fully customizable and controllable via an app, you can change the color settings on these throughout the day, giving you the perfect lighting for any situation. 6. Active Noise Cancelling Headphones – Huge Headphones never go out of style — and with the help of Active-Noise Cancellation, you’ll want to wear them everywhere. Many of us with sound sensitivities, or those that consider themselves sensory-seeking, may already have a long-standing love for headphones, and music as a whole. Headphones with Active Noise Cancellation take that to the next level. If you don’t already have a pair, I definitely recommend getting your hands on a pair of Over-the-Ear Bluetooth Headphones with Active Noise Cancellation. Active Noise Cancellation allows your headphones to react to your environment, supplying a near-inaudibly stream of white noise to counteract any environmental distractions. Not only do ANC headphones make your music sound better — but they can also make moving through the world easier too. 7. A Sensory Swing – Sometimes, we just want to turn the entire world off. But if a $3000 Sensory Deprivation Tank is a bit out of your price range, then a Sensory Swing is undoubtedly the next best thing. And hey, who says the kids get to have all the fun? Sensory Swings have no age limit! Sensory Swings are pod-like hammocks made of a stretchy material like Lycra. They’re designed to hug you all over, delivering the same Deep Pressure Therapy that makes weighted blankets so great. And while a tiny space like that may sound like a nightmare to some, the soothing sensory input they provide can offer some Neurodivergent people amazing peace and immediate benefits. Sensory Swings are perfect for offering you a much-needed place to go in times of stress. Think of it like a hideaway — hidden away from sounds, bright lights, and other sensory stressors. Besides hitting a metaphorical reset on your nervous system, Sensory Swings have the added bonus of incorporating gentle movement — something a lot of Autistic adults may lack. They’re easy to install to most ceilings, and with most models able to hold up to 250lbs or more, these stretchy cocoons are the perfect sensory safe space. 8. Comfort Foods-To-Go – Having a To-Go comfort food is a no-brainer. A small snack heated in the microwave, a sandwich that can be thrown together, or even having your favorite warm drink on hand can save you infinite time, headaches, and executive functioning. Keep these handy (and cheap) options around and always stocked, and you’ll be thanking yourself when you come out the other side of hyperfocus. For me, these treats are usually pre-packaged croissants that I can microwave with a bit of butter for a sweet dose of carbs. But in times of high stress — a cup of hot tea is always my go-to. The ritual of prepping your snack can be soothing in and of itself, like the consistent rhythm of constructing your favorite sandwich, in the same order, every time. Finding and identifying a 5-minute comfort food is something all Autistic adults should do, whether it be for late nights of hyperfocus, or on days when your executive functioning isn’t exactly functioning. 9. A Special Interest Item – It goes without saying but ( — since I love talking about Special Interests ) I’ll say it anyway. No matter what the age, Special Interests are things that are important and incredibly enriching to autistic people, young and old. Not only are they things that help us process or cope with the allistic world around us, but they can drive us to develop new skills too. Make no mistake — Special Interests should be fostered and even celebrated. Having a tangible item having to do with your interests does just that. If you’re into Marine Biology, having a shirt of your favorite kind of whale may feel indulgent, and empowering when you wear it. If you are really into a specific video game, having a poster you can see even when not playing can bring you great joy. Special Interests color our lives in unfathomable ways, and although we may be shamed for them by the people around us, we should love and — take advantage of them. Consider being indulgent, and buying yourself a plushie, an article of clothing, a figurine, or a poster of your interest. Special Interests are special to us for a reason. They’re there to bring us joy! 10. A Community – Some things are worth more than money could ever buy. When living with Autism Spectrum Disorder, it can often feel like living at odds with the world — its sensory experiences, its logic, and most of all, other people. Over time, it can feel more and more isolating. And this feeling is one many of us experience all our lives, from childhood to the everyday workplace — and even our own homes. When you’re an autistic adult, a community is priceless. And it can look any way you feel comfortable with. For some, community means having a few Autistic friends or connecting with other Autistic people online via a forum or Discord. For others, a community can be a formal meet-up group, with returning members, scheduled activities, and routine meetups. Others may find Zoom groups more comfortable. Whatever your preferred form of connection may be — it’s a connection nonetheless. Talking, connecting, and befriending other Autistic people can often be one of the first steps of unmasking, uncovering, and unlearning neurotypical expectations, and even voicing thoughts you’d had forever. (Like why does everyone ask “How are you doing?” if it’s not really a question????) Communities can look any way, and many have social meets like D&D sessions or group chats on learning useful neurodivergent skills. No matter how you jump in though, I hope you find your happy place. Whether you’re formally diagnosed, self-diagnosed, or just questioning whether or not you may be Autistic — living as a Neurodivergent adult can be undoubtedly tough. With daily dysregulation and lengthy recovery times, things like self-care and soothing can be a mystery. It can be hard to even know what you need, let alone where to begin. And living in a world full of Instagram ‘grind’ culture accounts and allistic self-help books surely doesn’t help. But if there’s one thing that anyone living on the Spectrum needs on their journey — 100% — it’s Self-Acceptance. By understanding ourselves and our brains, we can begin to discover and name our needs. We can begin to take care of ourselves in new, more fruitful ways that make life easier, and more enjoyable. We’re able to create spaces, routines, and relationships that can revitalize us, and change our lives. I hope that through this list, you’re able to understand yourself or your needs a bit more and begin incorporating things into your life that can help make coping with ASD easier. What are some tools in your meltdown toolbox? Are there any Autistic-friendly things you can’t live without? I’d love to hear! Thanks for reading and have a divergent day! Read More »

The Challenge of Settling My Itchy AuDHD Mind: Why Can’t I Just Do It?